Lane's Ramblings

4:45am... the alarm is beeping like crazy... louder than usual, it seems... "stop it!"... "whose idea was this?"... hit the snooze button... staring at the ceiling - it's dark but a little bit of light from the streetlights comes in through the window... "Why am I doing this?"....... "This is crazy"..... "All right - let's go."

I didn't know much about snowboarding in Australia. I knew that I was going to Mt Buller, which I've been to before but in the summer, and that it was about 3 hours away. I also knew that once I got up there I would either need to take a bus from Mansfield or rent some tire chains to drive up the mountain. The chains are precautionary - the village of Mt Buller is close to the top of the mountain and you have to drive through switchbacks the entire way up, or what's worse, the entire way down. On top of that, most Australians have zero to little experience with driving on ice and snow and Melburnians are VERY cautious drivers. Otherwise this is just a scam to take more of your money - 16 bucks to have these things sit on the floor of my car and, yes, they do check at the gate to make sure you have them. There was no snow or ice on the mountain where I was driving.

I also didn't know how the mountain or the snow would be. I knew that it would be wet snow, similar to the Northeast of the US, and that it really doesn't snow very often but they're having the best winter for snow in 15 years. Mt Buller is the closest large ski area to Melbourne and the summit comes in around 5920ft, close to the altitude of the highest mountains in New Hampshire (Mt Washington is 6288). The difference? It snows at sea level in NH - even though I do complain about the cold in Melbourne, I don't think it's ever been below 40F. And when you tell the Aussies that you're going boarding they're almost apologetic about the snow and the mountains. So my expectations weren't high.

To add to that the last two times that I've been snowboarding were for a week in Colorado in March of this year and a week in Austria and Switzerland a year ago. Even with all of this against it, I would have to say that the snowboarding at Mt Buller was awesome. The snow was great, the mountain was cool, the trails were nice (albeit, a little short).

I made my way up the Maroonda Hwy - I've been this way before so there was nothing new. The speed was pretty good and I was making good time but there were quite a few other cars on the road aiming for the same destination that I was. At this point I had intentions of taking the bus from Mansfield but as I got closer I realized that there was no reason to. I stopped in Mansfield to pick up a coffee and a bit of breakfast and also to rent some chains. The first place I tried to get chains in also rented ski equipment and winter clothes and was just mobbed with people but had a huge rack of chains by the door. I was sort of waiting in line and an employee was walking by and said, "can I help anyone?" I jumped in hoping that I could bypass the line since I didn't really need anything else and his reply was, "try the BP up the road, they have heaps of chains." Ok, he's sending me to another business, to me that says "get out while you can." But even the BP was packed with people and I waited in line for 15 minutes. Finally it was my turn and I spewed off my tire size like I knew what I was talking about and he came back with, "have you ever used chains before?"; of course; "on this car?"; yes; and even though he gave me a questioning glance he handed me the chains and I was on my way. To tell you the truth I've never used these things before and even though I'm sure I could figure out how to put them on I have no idea. Australians are confused by this because they don't understand the concept of driving in the snow without them - "so did you have a 4wd in the States?"; "no, I drove a little Honda Civic"; "how deep was the snow?"; "I don't know, I'd probably drive in up to 6 inches or a foot of snow with that car."; "really? I can't believe that."



The next line was to get into the parking lot at the base of the ski area, I'm still unsure of why this is so difficult, and then waiting in line for lift tickets. this is what makes boarding here such a production - you have to drive there, get the chains and if you don't have equipment you have to rent that, wait for the cautious drivers to drive up the mountain, watch everybody park, wait in line for the tickets while everybody uses a credit card, and then wait in line for the lifts. It's also expensive:

Gas - I used about 3/4 of a tank but I'm driving a Corolla but gas is also expensive here so let's say $40
Chains - 16 bucks for rental
Park Pass - this is ridiculous; $30; this might be per person too (I was by myself so I'm not sure)
Coffee - 2 dollars - this is actually a really good price
Lift tickets - $92
New goggles since I left my sunglasses in the car - $59 (actually I needed new goggles anyway - anyone remember the ones that I had with the red scratch across the lenses?)

Total - a lot of freaking money - this better be a damn good time



I took the lift from the parking lot and not from the village so I was glad to see that there was a place at the top to get some 59 dollar goggles and some breakfast. You people have pasties in MI, right? And from my time there it seems that you're all very proud of that but you know that they're English, I hope? And because of that they're all over Australia too and they have veggie ones, which is good for me. Melbourne also has meat pies, which they're big on, and you can have either one any time but they're big for breakfast. So, I was in line (yes, another line) and looking forward to a veggie pasty if they had any (that's not always the case). I got to the front and inquired about what I sought but the girl behind the counter came back with, "what do you want?"; I repeated, "a veggie pasty"; "I'm sorry?"; after a back and forth exchange and repeating what I was looking for 5 times she said, "oh, you mean pasty." Here was the problem, I was asking for "pasty" and pronouncing the 'a' as in 'ass' but she was looking for the 'a' to be pronounced as the first 'a' in 'pasta'. Come on, chickee, it's not that much different and anyone that has seen the word in print can make that jump, give me a break here. The next problem, I was looking for a veggie pasty, "do you have any veggie pasties?"; "Aren't all pasties veggie?"; "Umm.. I'm not sure" I was pretty sure they weren't but she should know better than I do, I would think; "Let me check"; she runs off to ask someone; I'm holding up the line; she's back; "No, they're all meat"; that's quite a difference from your original answer.. "Thanks, I'll have a muffin."



Have we even been snowboarding yet? I'm back outside and at the top of the trail, strap in and wiggle my way to the edge, I lean forward.. and we're off. The first run since March. 30 seconds later I'm at the bottom. Ok, that's a bit of an exaggeration but the trail was short.. and to make it worse, the line for the lift was gigantic. Maybe even enormous. But you know what it wasn't? Ginormous. You know why? Because ginormous isn't a word, I don't care what the people in Merriam-Webster's marketing department say. I believe in the evolution of language and even believe that literary sources that coin a term that enters the country's lexicon deserves notice but to choose a group of letters that some people call a word just because it is seen in print and is used as a novelty or, even worse, wins the "favorite word that isn't in the dictionary" contest is no reason to degrade the language by putting a fad into the record of what defines our spoken language for our time. You know what I'm going to do? Next time I get a new dictionary I'm crossing that bad boy out. How do you feel about that?



Where was I? Yes, so the snow was great - it wasn't powder but it wasn't too wet. It was packed but it wasn't ice. It was nice, you could grab an edge and make clean turns and you wouldn't kill yourself if you took a spill. I think this one was a blue and there was no way I was waiting in that lift line again so I headed up to some other blues. Buller has two sides, the North Slopes and the South Slopes - you start out at the North Slopes but the South Slopes have fewer people and more blues and blacks. I worked my way up to the summit and from there you have two choices: Summit (blue) and Summit (black) - blue keeps you on the north side and black takes you to the south side. We might as well get started.. down the black. It was steep but really not that steep. I played around on the south side for a while on the blues and blacks and it was fun. The trails were wide - very wide (compared to the Northeast of the States), some of the blues had a lot of people on them but the blacks were empty, the moguls on the blacks were gino... really big, which took a lot out of me.



I came to a stop at a food hut about halfway down the mountain and decided to rest for a bit because my leg was bothering me. That's when the trouble started. When I first strapped my board on in the morning I realized that my legs were tired - from running of course - but it was my front leg, the one that doesn't get detached from the board all day that was hurting. Two problems with this, the backplate of my bindings might have been too far forward and my legs are constantly in the state of recovery, when you put them in the same position for a few hours - like in a slight bend forward - they fall apart. The left leg hurt a little while I was boarding but now that it was out I was in serious pain - it was either my achilles or my calf muscle, I couldn't tell. Now I not only had to put the board back on and get down the hill, I also had to get back up the hill and board down the other side. I adjusted the backplates and made my way down the hill and up the chairlift. Next I had to get back to the village to grab the shuttle back to my car, which requried a quick glide down a green trail. Oh my god. It was "Demo Days", which meant every tourist that has never seen snow, never mind been on snowboard or skis, was lying on this trail in huge groups trying to get down the hill on borrowed skis and snowboards. Somehow I navigated by all of the moving obstacles and was the last one to squeeze myself onto a bus as it pulled out of the parking lot.



I got to the car and started down the mountain but my windshield was covered in filth from the salted roads. I don't need to use washing fluid very often and I'm always returning a rental car so I never have to add any but I was out and I needed some. I had to drop off the chains at the BP anyway, I'll pick some up. It's the little differences that make the good stories and interesting conversations. I looked around for the pallet of washing fluid that you usually find outside of gas stations in the States but there was nothing. I looked in the store.. they must keep them out back. I also don't know what they call it so I tried to be descriptive, "hi, I'm looking for some washing fluid for my windscreen"; inquisitive look, "what are you looking for?"; "umm, washing fluid for my windscreen.. you put it in the tank in your car" as I showed the approximate dimensions of the reservoir with my hands; "oh, I know what you're after"; he brings me a bottle that's about half a liter; "Uhh.. I was looking for the stuff that uh you put in your car for cleaning the uh windscreen"; "yeah, that's it you just squeeze some of that in there"; "uh ok" and I paid and walked out with it. Later I learned that they put water in their reservoir and this just makes the windshield especially clean - I guess they're not concerned about the water freezing or anything like that.



I got back to my apartment and thought about getting some food - I didn't have any in my apartment - but I was in too much pain to even walk down the street to get anything. So I pulled together the last remaining food in the house and called that dinner. I was also supposed to meet up with some people to watch the rugby game but that was definitely not going to happen either. The next day my body gave me a message: "I'm freaking tired! Leave me alone!" So that's what I've been doing.. running has stopped for a few days, which is fine, and I've been working on getting some sleep, which I badly need.

The outlook for this week is probably the same as the last few but with less running. Saturday I'm heading to the footy to see my Saints (St Kilda) take on Hawthorn. Even though this is the most exciting season in years (or so I'm told) and any of 10 teams can make the finals, the Saints (I picked them because I live there - I thought it was a good reason) have been destroyed by injuries and sit somewhere towards the bottom of the standings but we're slowly moving up. A win against Hawthorn (2nd place) would be a big boost for them, I think... but, again, I don't know what I'm talking about. This also means that I'll be missing the next Australia vs New Zealand rugby match that will be finishing off the Tri-Nations Tournament. That's all right, though, they can do it without me.